A day long fabled...
April 30th, the Day of the Brandon.
Brandon History Month is a time of reflection for this influential folk hero, majestic admiral of America's dreams.
The Day of the Brandon is more festive.
In Mexico, they dance around tables in victory, they do the hokey pokey with the right leg in only, as a tribute to Brandon's Right Leg which created the Yucatan Pennisula.
In Sweden, they stay up really late and tell tales of Brandon's mighty left arm, The Hammer, which was a mighty tool in the liberation of the Swedes in 1328.
In Russia, they have a day of sad remembrance, when they tried to copy the power of Brandon's right arm. The project ultimately failed. See also, Chernobyl.
In France, they give thanks to Brandon's Left Leg, without it the English Channel would never have been formed, giving the English free travel to the continent.
So you see, this isn't merely Brandon's birthday, it is the world's Birthday. And as Brandon is ever a generous demi-god, humble and true, we leave this missive with a gift for you...